When Questions are Louder Than Answers

On any given day, and at any given time, news may come our way that will raise seemingly unanswerable questions. Interestingly, had the situation not occurred, the answers seem innumerable. But in the days following tragedy, the questions are often louder than the answers. When tragedy occurs, it's as if our ear holes are in the shape of a heart... and the answers are in the shape of a dagger. The hurting person simply can't hear the help that is being offered, regardless how true it may be. Few words seem to help bring resolve. So how do we help those who can't seem to find God in their darkest times?
When Lazarus died in John 11, Jesus brought comfort to his friends Martha and Mary. While we can not raise the dead, we can follow Christ's example of comfort in dark times. 
Jesus, on the scene
First we see that Jesus showed up to the scene of heartache. How important it is for us to be there for others in their darkest hours. Many times, our greatest comfort to others comes simply by being there for them. They may never forget when you came to their home or waiting room. When words wont do, holding the hand of the broken hearted goes a long, long way.
Jesus, the Listener
Long before hope is verbally offered, we need to be a people with listening ears. Martha was no different than we are. She very quickly began to make accusation toward God. Verse 21 says, "Then said Martha unto Jesus, Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died." Jesus did not rebuke her, but rather, He listened. Imagine that; God listened to this hurting woman. How much more should we listen to those who speak words of pain in times of heartache?
Jesus, the Hope Giver
When Martha approached Jesus as He came on the scene of death, He offered her hope. Verse 23 says, "Jesus saith unto her, Thy brother shall rise again".  In a time of tragedy, everyone wants to know that this is not the end. Saying something like, "WE are going to get through this together... I am not leaving you... I will help you get through this" gives some reassurance that there is light at the end of their dark tunnel.
Jesus, the Refocuser 
In our story, Jesus asked a great question of Martha which diverted her attention from death to life. Verse 26 says,  "And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die. Believest thou this?" If the hurting person will even remotely listen, ask them questions about the faith. Making God real and big is important. It also allows them to see life instead of death.
Jesus the Sympathizer
Our story of Lazarus' death allows us an opportunity to see a side of Jesus that was never before, and never again, seen. Verse 35 says, "Jesus wept." How important it is for the hurting to see how we are affected by their loss. Strength does not have to come in words or deeds. Sometimes strength comes through our tears. Feel free to share how their loss means to you as well.
Jesus, the Prayerer
In verses 40 and 41, Jesus lifts His voice to heaven and begins to pray. Offering regular audible prayers helps to give comfort to the hurting. Holding some one's hand and asking, "May I pray for you" shows that God is not distant, but very, very near. In your prayer, confess that you lack the necessary answers at this time but have faith that God will reveal His purpose in time. 
For such a time as this, you have been called to be a person of comfort. When questions are louder than answers, your presence gives more comfort than you may know. Holding their hand, hugging their neck, listening to their questions and weeping with them will make the answers more tolerable in time. And they will never forget how you loved them in their darkest hours.


Pastor Mike Carmody